Sunday, August 20, 2006

stardust

I wish I could share this little corner of my house, of which I never quite exploited its potential. Its late night beauty.
The sound of running water into the pond coupled with strains of slow jazz and love songs; the arm chair on the wooden patio complete with those wooden blinds; the tealights i placed along the edge. I am the master of atmosphere. I just lack the wine.
It has to be/would be the perfect spot for a late night conversation. But for now, it is the perfect spot for late night thoughts.


Growing up never quite seemed so complicated as this. Sometimes you feel like you're in control and at times you feel yourself spiralling further and further away from anything you've ever known before. Sometimes you feel like you're at the top of the world and sometimes you feel like you're just pond scum. And then, there are times where you just feel like going limp and just float along. Wouldn't it be so much easier to not think at all, you say.
But you find yourself pondering more and more about things, some of which you might not have the answer to.Questions of life,love, relationships, the people around you.. yourself.

Sometimes you tell yourself that you should be strong, because emo-ing is weakness, and sometimes, stripped of everything else, you realize that as clear as day, you're vulnerable and soft at the core. And possibly everyone, under the many layers they hide their real self, are really just the same. All with their own insecurities, and demons to fight. Just too afraid to tell it to your face.

Sometimes, its so easy to lose yourself, to just want to get along. And then as you tread this path, you find yourself questioning more, however much you might loathe it, questioning even what you've believed all along. And if your life were to be seen as this one path, then, there are those people who cross your path just once, those of whom have left an impression, but are now gone, somehow;those whose paths diverge,run parallel but are always there somewhere; those people who have altered the course of your path.

So we all have love and lost, understood the pain and heartache that comes with it. We've all made our mistakes and grown from it. And now we just hope to be found. A little more love couldn't hurt.

//And now the purple dusk of twilight time
Steals across the meadows of my heart
High up in the sky the little stars climb
Always reminding me that were apart
You wander down the lane and far away
Leaving me a song that will not die
Love is now the stardust
Of yesterday
The music
Of the years
Gone by

wen at 2:04 AM

0comments

0 Comments

Post a Comment